For nearly a month now the only news I’ve come across has been that which people on my social media platforms have commented on. So unless it is a hot topic on Mumsnet or inspires a friend to post a link on Facebook I’ve been in the dark. I rather imagined this would be the case and that my world would get very small after my son was born and would then gradually open out again. It came as a surprise to one of the midwives on the maternity ward however, when she remarked on a hurricane or some such and was surprised I had no idea what she was talking about. I’m not sure how she thought I’d be gaining information what with it being my fifth night in a hospital with poor WiFi signal on a ward that didn’t feature a newspaper the entire time I was there. Perhaps she thought the husband was rushing to my bedside to discuss the weather rather than how the baby was doing.
At any rate one story has popped up in enough places that despite my most blinkered stumbling through the days I have picked up the gist of it. Two Australian DJs phoned King Edward VII Hospital where the Duchess of Cambridge had been admitted for Hyperemesis gravidarum pretending to be the Queen and Prince Charles. Then amid criticism for the nursing staff who gave out personal information, Jacintha Saldanha committed suicide.
A sad thing to happen but bewilderingly there has been utter vitriol for the DJs and I can’t for the life of me see what they did wrong or how they are in any way responsible. People are responsible for their own actions. Yes they can be pushed to desperation by the actions of others but if Saldanha truly killed herself due to this one instance of public humiliation then she must have been near the edge already. That she was a mother and in a caring profession makes me quite uneasy as surely someone should have seen she was having problems. I completely fail to believe the media storm was anything but the final straw in the life of a desperate woman.
I’m left wondering why people get so angry and why they directed it at the DJs. Is it because it can’t be directed at Saldanha? After all, it is her actions that have devastated her family. When dealing with grief anger is a normal response and given the fury I have at times felt towards my father and stepfather for dying on us, I can’t begin to imagine how you process someone choosing to inflict that upon you (and sorry but I just don’t buy mental illness as an excuse, depression or whatever just isn’t on a par with cancer).
We aren’t allowed to judge those that take their own lives. We’re meant to be understanding and sympathetic. Does this mean that we are left with judgement needed to be directed somewhere, anywhere and in this instance the DJs are an easy target?
I must be quite quite insane.
This time last year our house was in the final stages of being renovated whilst I planned my wedding and tried to establish a freelance career. It was a bit much and the noise and flow of people through the house saw me put the copywriting to one side.
A year on and while juggling my fledgling agency and a newborn baby it seemed a great time to get a new kitchen...
My reasoning was based on the fact the kitchen fitters weren’t available any earlier and I wanted it doing at some point. Would it be any easier with a toddler? With a small child? At least a baby sleeps most of the time and doesn’t move much. It’s fine actually and it’s only taking three days (then a few days with a plasterer then shopping for light fittings and tiles then trying to find a decorator and hmm...).
The business isn’t terribly optional what with the husband having been made redundant but the upside is he can take care of our son while I try to cobble together enough brain cells to work.
And the baby can’t be dropped as he’s the point of pretty much everything. He’s also pretty vocal about his needs being met.
What is strange is that it’s been six weeks since I posted and yet PFB (Precious First Born*) is only 15 days and the husband only took down the old kitchen tiles (kick starting the kitchen renovation) on Sunday. While I feel like I’m living in a slight fog of sleep deprivation and dairy cow empathy I’m actually about as focused and driven as I’ve ever been. I’m loathe to procrastinate at my laptop as time spent typing is time spent not gazing at the utter perfection of PFB.
As soon as I realise I need a screen break I bundle PFB into the pram and we head out for a walk. I wrote the above between tasks because I needed to get some of it out of my head and wanted to get back into the habit of writing but I’m done now. I intend to regain the habit of writing this column but for now I have a baby to gaze at and a husband to celebrate with.
He came home from picking my stepsons up from school with good news. He got a job offer today!
* Gotta love Mumsnet terminology!